- getting out of your warm, cozy bed in the morning.
- bringing yourself to have a shower.
- bringing yourslef to go out the door and go to work/school/uni or whatever you have to do.
- cooking yourself dinner.
- going out in the cold.
- going food shopping.
- finding something to wear.
- do the housework.
- going to that meeting you're dreading.
- giving that speech you feel so nervous about.
- writing the test that you are unsure if you studied correctly for.
- handing in a report you are unsure about.
I cannot get over how mentally disordered our whole society is. We get bombarded with messages about how to slim down, get toned, get fit, and at the same time how much we must love and accept ourselves for who we are and what bodies we have. Cause everyone is different and unique but we must all try and mold ourselves into the ideal body that society wants us to have. But don’t forget to love yourself.
This isn’t helped by the fact that we base our entire worth around our looks. If we do not get appreciation for our looks we are worth nothing. This applies to both men and women, but there is a big imbalance between the sexes here. Men and women comment on other women’s bodies to an absurd amount. It is as if we are all free to just judge all girls and women out there on whether or not they are “fuckable” enough, “sexy” enough or “pretty” enough. We just splurt out all these stupid ass comments, no care who is listening or not. Maybe it’s your daughter hearing you say these words. “Nah, I wouldn’t go near that” or “I’d definitely fuck that”. I mean, first of all. You are talking about a human being, not an object, so stop making her into one. Why is it so hard to use the pronoun “her”? Would you like anyone to refer to your daughter, sister, mother, wife as an object? Or would you like to be an object yourself? No? Stop doing it yourself then. You may not know her, but she is still a person and whether or not you find her non-attractive or “fuckable” doesn’t remove that fact. Second, what message do you think you send out when telling everyone if you would fuck “that” or not fuck “that”? Why is it important? Why can you not keep that to yourself? Is it a game you must play to seem “hard”? By comments like this, girls grow up to believe that the one thing that matters most is whether or not she is attractive. Intelligence? Humour? Interests? No, girls believe that men want sexy, pretty women that giggles quietly and loves shopping so they can take the piss out of their love for shopping, because the less the woman is like a man, the more a man becomes a man. Right?
But mind you, a woman cannot be too sexy, or try too hard to fit into the category of “fuckable” because then she’s a whore. She’s learned that without “sexiness” she’s worth nothing, so she tries to attain it, but if she tries too hard, she’s a whore. You see the problem? No matter what girls do they are either boring, ugly (not trying enough), whores, bitches (trying too hard), and a few “lucky” ones are sexy and fuckable. Yay! You made it. You have the appreciation of others and now you will be happy forever.
I’m not saying that you can never express that you find someone attractive. But it is HOW you express that. Saying “yeah, I’d fuck that” or “she’s really attractive, she looks happy/healthy/sweet/nice whatever” means too completely different things. Some people awakens sexual attraction and that’s natural, but going around making that person into an object is not ok. Walking around judging every person you see on whether you’d fuck them or not, is not okay. This applies to both men and women. I’m not saying men are not victims of this, because they are too, but let’s face it – women are the biggest sufferers of this body-shaming in society.
No wonder people are insecure. My god, we feel as if we get judged everywhere we go. And we do. From what I’ve experienced the last few years at least. We are not safe. We are told to love ourselves but how can we do that if our worth as HUMAN BEINGS is based on our looks?
It is so goddamn disordered. When did being happy, joyful, intelligent, witty, strong, independent, affirmative, kind, loving, generous, hard-working, ambitious, healthy, etc become less important than looks? Never, I’d say.